Does your partner refuse to grow up, make a real commitment, and take responsibility for their own life? They might be struggling with Peter Pan Syndrome—and it might be time to cut them off.

What Is Peter Pan Syndrome?

Coined by Psychologist Dr. Dan Kiley in his 1983 book, The Peter Pan Syndrome: Men Who Have Never Grown Up, this concept references J.M. Barrie’s infamous literary character Peter Pan—the free-spirited, young boy who never grows up.

“Peter Pan Syndrome is essentially when an adult struggles to grow up,” says Dr. Mindy DeSeta, sexologist and mental health counselor at Hily Dating App. “They often avoid age-appropriate responsibilities, have difficulty managing real-world tasks, and have limited emotional maturity. Basically, they avoid the expectations society has placed on adults.”

While it’s not an actual mental health diagnosis, it describes a very real, very common experience for many adults—especially when it comes to relationships and commitment. 

“More commonly, this phrase is used to reference men, but women can fall into this trap as well,” says Dr. DeSeta. “In couples, it often shows up as one partner falling into the parent role, while the other voids adult responsibilities and slides into a childlike role. Over time, the partner carrying the mental and physical load begins to feel resentful, alone, and eventually starts distancing themselves.”

How Peter Pan Syndrome Shows Up in Relationships

In a relationship context, Peter Pan Syndrome is especially frustrating for the other partner, who often falls into a parenting role.

“Peter Pan Syndrome leads to emotional unfulfillment, unfinished goals, money issues, relationship challenges, and a career that never takes off,” Dr. DeSeta explains. “In relationships, over time the person carrying the load becomes the one managing both of their lives. The caregiver pays the bills, tends to household duties, manages the social calendar, and makes the hard decisions alone. Over time, the caregiver mentally gets broken down, begins to feel emotionally depleted, and becomes resentful.”

Once this occurs and enough damage to the connection is done, it can be challenging for both partners to recover. 

“It’s very difficult to feel desire for your partner when you feel you have to parent them,” Dr. DeSeta says. “As this continues, trust breaks down because the one in the parent role feels they can no longer count on their partner who has taken on the child role.”

Is Your Partner a Peter Pan?

When determining whether your partner has Peter Pan Syndrome, Dr. DeSeta outlines a few key signs to look for:

1. They Avoid Responsibility

In an equal partnership, both individuals should share or take on their own set of responsibilities, finding a middle ground that works for them. However, if you’re dealing with a Peter Pan, you might be shouldering all the work.

“If you notice you’re always the one making the calls, checking in, or taking the lead when it comes to planning a date, those are the red flags to not overlook,” says Dr. DeSeta.

2. They Avoid Emotional Conversations

Someone who refuses to grow up often refuses to have adult conversations, too.

“People who struggle with Peter Pan Syndrome struggle to manage heavy emotions,” Dr. DeSeta explains. “They will make a joke to break up the seriousness of the conversation.”

3. They Avoid Accountability

Peter Pans are essentially allergic to accountability.

“They will always make an excuse for why their life is the way it is,” Dr. DeSeta explains. “Taking responsibility for the choices is too emotionally heavy for them to manage.”

4. They Prioritize Fun Above All Else

While lighthearted fun is certainly a necessary part of any relationship, it can’t hold merit over emotional depth, dependability, and adult responsibilities.

“You will notice that the relationship feels hollow and intimacy feels shallow,” Dr. DeSeta says. “They pull back whenever the moment requires vulnerability, only allowing the couple to bond so much.”

Should You Stay or Should You Go?

While Peter Pan Syndrome is certainly a red flag in most cases, it isn’t always a death sentence for every relationship.

“Start with a conversation,” Dr. DeSeta recommends. “Share what you are noticing in them and what you are desiring in a long-term partner. Acknowledge the pattern before running from it.”

For example, you might explain to your partner that you feel like you’re carrying all the responsibilities and mental load in the relationship. Then, you can request more help from them. How they respond will reveal your next steps.

“It is a red flag if they become extremely defensive or try to place the blame back on you,” Dr. DeSeta says. “At the end of the day, you can only use your words to share what you are looking for in them and in the relationship. If they do not change, then it is time to end the relationship.”

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We’re dealing with a loneliness epidemic and a literacy epidemic at the same time, so there is a bit of unfortunate logic to the news that, according to a team of researchers who published their findings in Perspectives on Psychological Science, the human race has spent two decades slowly whittling down the number of words we are speaking every year.

As the BBC reported, researchers at the University of Missouri–Kansas City and the University of Arizona analyzed audio data from 22 studies involving more than 2,000 participants. They weren’t even trying to find this. All of this began as they were attempting to replicate the findings of an old paper on gender differences in talkativeness, but lead authors Dr. Valeria Pfeifer and Prof. Matthias Mehl happened upon a weird and disconcerting pattern: between 2005 and 2019, the average person’s daily spoken word count plummeted from about 16,000 words to 12,700 words.

That’s a 20 percent drop in overall words spoken, or an average of about 338 words that go missing from our mouths every day, totaling about 120,000 fewer words spoken per person every year.

Humans Are Becoming Less Talkative, and a New Study Reveals Just How Much

Modern technology is the easy thing to blame, and it deserves some of the blame. Participants under 25 showed the steepest decline, 452 words unsaid annually, which we can largely attribute to tech reducing how much we have to say to one another. The real problem here is how our society of the past 15 to 20 years has restructured itself around a lack of human contact.

Think about it: if you’re outdoing your Saturday chores, think about how many fewer people you interact with than you used to, now that so many businesses force you to use self-checkout lanes and touchscreen kiosks. Our reliance on tech has engineered humanity out of all the places where we once experienced human contact. As much as GPS can be a lifesaver, it has made it obsolete to ask someone for directions, to the point where, personally, it feels weird when someone asks me for directions. Don’t you have a phone that can do that for you?

The researchers point out that total communication might technically remain stable thanks to all the texting we do; typed words don’t deliver the same emotional punch as a human voice and physical presence in a real-life conversation. We’ve spent 200,000 years feeling accepted as part of a larger community by speaking face-to-face, and in about 15 to 20 years, we’ve seemingly done everything we can to sever the deep, personal connection we’ve built with one another.

Who knows where it goes from here, but so far it seems to be draining us of something we need.

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About once a year, some Florida-based police department likes to prove it’s more dystopian than any other in the state by unveiling some new, preposterous, entirely impractical gizmo that I guess is supposed to prove that they’re on the cutting edge of technology, but fails spectacularly to do so. Last year, it was an AI-powered autonomous police vehicle that can shoot out drones. The 2026 edition of this foolishness comes in the form of a very stupid-looking quadcopter for one.

Florida Polytechnic University in Lakeland has officially integrated “Astro,” a flying electric vertical takeoff and landing (eVTOL) vehicle, into its campus police department.

According to reporting from Fox13, the university paid nearly $150,000 for the modified Jetson ONE personal aircraft, complete with custom police decals and a tiny, hilarious light bar. Weighing 154 pounds without a battery or pilot, the single-seat hovercraft tops out at 65 mph.

The Tiny Flying Cop Car Is Kind of Precious, Right?

Visually, the machine is a joke unto itself, but you’ll soon realize its looks are just the setup. Here’s the punchline: its maximum flight time is only 20 minutes before the battery dies. As long as you can outrun the thing for less than the time it takes to watch an episode of Seinfeld, feel free to commit as many crimes as you want when it’s on patrol.

Officials still haven’t received final FAA approval for the aircraft, though they hope to get the green light by late 2026. Chief Aaron Murray defended the $150k price tag, claiming Astro will aid in search-and-rescue operations, post-storm recovery, and reaching inaccessible areas. The vehicle is also being used by local engineering and computer science students to design virtual reality training simulators for officers.

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If you’ve intuited by now that the people at the very top of the corporate hierarchy are complete and utter wackos who have little regard for human life, you’d probably think that there’s just something about the version of the corporate CEO that came around sometime during the Industrial Revolution that is uniquely psychopathic.

A research team publishing their findings in the Asian Journal of Business Ethics, however, found that corporate psychopathy is nothing new, since there is strong evidence of a maniac fostering a toxic workplace dating back to 1629.

And of course, they were an executive with the Dutch East India Company, one of the old world’s foremost examples of a corporation run amok.

Jeronimus Cornelisz was an under-merchant for the Dutch East India Company and a contender for the worst boss in recorded history. When the company’s flagship, Batavia, hit a reef near Western Australia, senior management hopped into a longboat to go get help, leaving Cornelisz in charge of roughly 200 stranded survivors. What followed was absolute chaos and insanity that ended with mutiny and massacre, as Cornelisz immediately initiated a hostile takeover.

The Hallmark Traits of a Corporate Psychopath

According to study author Clive Boddy of Anglia Ruskin University, Cornelisz ticked off all ten hallmark traits of a modern corporate psychopath, which are…

Not being in it to help, but for the attainment of money and power.

Use superficial charm to gain trust.

Surround themselves with loyalists and yes-men.

Clear the path of anyone who might challenge them.

Create division among enemies.

Create a climate of fear.

Refuse to take responsibility when all of their bad ideas inevitably blow up in their face.

Cornelisz met all 10 criteria, and he did so by purging the existing island council, replacing them with loyal lackeys who swore personal oaths to him, and exiled potential whistleblowers to nearby islands so they could starve to death. To stretch out the remaining water and food, he ordered his goons to systematically murder around 100 men, women and children, all while subjecting women to sexual abuse and hoarding the ship’s gold inside his personal tent so he could start a pirate empire.

It’s Not All Bad, Though

In the midst of all of Cornelisz’s chaos, the exact kind of person Cornelisz thought he was rose to power — a soldier named Wiebbe Hayes. Cornelisz had left Wiebbe and his group stranded on an island. The group found freshwater to drink and plenty of food to eat. They eventually fought off Cornelisz’s gang until a rescue ship arrived.

As Clive Boddy explained, “Perhaps the most striking finding is that another leader facing the same circumstances achieved completely different outcomes. Hayes built cooperation, discovered new resources and kept people alive. This was effectively a natural experiment in leadership. One group prospered while the other descended into murder and abuse.”

As for Cornelisz, his insane lust for power did not end well for him. Authorities chopped off his hands and hanged him by the neck. Goes to show that corporate psychopaths like him have been making life miserable for people for centuries, and while they have their fun for a time, it ultimately rarely ends well for people like him.

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When you think of infertility, you likely consider medical-related issues that prevent individuals or couples from having children. Infertility is a disease that affects the reproductive system and can make pregnancy challenging or even impossible without the proper medical intervention.

But what about those who want and can physically have children, yet are hindered by their social circumstances? Also known as social infertility, this complex experience is common for many individuals, especially those who don’t have a partner or couples in the LGBTQ+ community.

What Is Social Infertility?

According to Janene Oleaga, a fertility attorney and reproductive rights advocate specializing in surrogacy, egg donation, sperm donation, embryo donation, and adoption, “Social infertility is most easily defined as an individual or couple that requires the assistance of another party to have a child for reasons aside from a medical diagnosis of infertility.”

“For example, a same-sex male couple may require an egg donor and a gestational surrogate in order to have a child regardless of whether they are diagnosed as medically infertile as individuals,” she shares.

Social infertility describes an entirely different struggle than medical infertility, which is an actual disease of the male or female reproductive system. However, it’s still a common challenge many individuals and couples face today.

“As a fertility attorney and reproductive rights advocate, [I feel] the term social infertility highlights the fact that becoming a parent through assisted reproduction is not solely a medical issue,” says Oleaga. “It is also a question of access to care, equity under the law, and the legal and social structures that determine who can build a family.”

Who Does Social Infertility Impact?

Social infertility can impact many individuals across various demographics, from same-sex couples with limited access to resources to individuals who cannot afford medical support.

“[Social infertility] is not limited to only one sexual orientation, gender identity, or relationship status,” Oleaga says. “I would include single individuals hoping to have a child as socially infertile, along with heterosexual couples in which one or both partners have reproductive limitations that would make donor gametes or a gestational surrogate advisable or necessary, whether or not they have a diagnosis of medical infertility.”

Beyond medical conditions and reproductive disease, various barriers can impact someone’s ability to have a child. According to Oleaga, some of those include sexual orientation, family structure, financial barriers to family building, discrimination and stigma, geographic barriers, and restrictive laws and policies.

“Ideally, everyone would have access to effective fertility treatments, either through insurance or affordable care options,” adds Dr. Wildaliz Caro, PhD, Medical Contributor at Aura Recovery Center. “However, access to sexual and reproductive health (SRH) services, including fertility care and family-planning support, can be limited for some people. And, stigma can affect how people feel about themselves and how others treat them.”

How to Address Social Infertility

Social infertility is not the same as medical infertility, but that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be addressed. Oleaga advocates for better access to fertility care, insurance coverage, and laws and policies that protect this family planning goal.

“Access to fertility care should not depend on whether someone is in a heterosexual relationship or can demonstrate a particular medical diagnosis,” says Oleaga. “There’s so much work to do in this space.”

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You’ve likely heard of the mental health condition called body dysmorphia, which causes individuals to ruminate and dwell on their perceived physical flaws. But did you know there’s a similar term describing an unhealthy relationship with money? Also called money dysmorphia (not an actual diagnosis), this term describes a fixation on and distorted view of one’s personal finances.

An Expert’s Take on Money Dysmorphia

Money dysmorphia describes a warped or inaccurate view of your own financial situation. Some people have a scarcity mindset despite having financial security and even abundance, while others are unaware of their own debt.

According to Steven Bradshaw, a licensed psychotherapist in Los Angeles and founder of Beyond Psychology Center, with a prior career in investment banking and private equity, there are various ways money dysmorphia can show up. For example, you might engage in one of the following behaviors: overestimating your security and spending too much; underestimating your security and living in fear; social comparison that causes feelings of inadequacy; limiting beliefs around what is financially possible for you; and avoiding the topic or issue of money altogether.

“Limiting beliefs are the ones I see having the greatest impact in my clients,” Bradshaw shares. “I like the term ‘scarcity mindset,’ or a deep-seated feeling of insecurity combined with defensive beliefs around money and success. “

Money dysmorphia can cause several mental health impacts like anxiety, self-doubt, low self-esteem, and even underinvesting in yourself and your passions, Bradshaw says.

“I hear clients say sentences like ‘I’m not good with money’ or ‘it will never work out for me,’ or take firm stances against the very thing that could change things (for example, asking for money from a parent or relocating),” he explains.

Causes of Money Dysmorphia

In my opinion, money dysmorphia feels like an inevitable outcome of today’s economy. However, several factors can contribute to this experience.

“Money dysmorphia is basically fear-conditioning or fear-learning that overgeneralizes,” Bradshaw explains. “It prevents us from making investments and backing ourselves, particularly at crucial make-or-break moments. It also causes avoidance and social comparison distress.”

For example, if someone grew up with financial insecurity or a lack of stability in their home, they might carry this trauma and fear into their adult lives, despite earning a high salary and maintaining a solid savings account.

“It results primarily through some conditioning from the environment, either as a result of personally experiencing a traumatic insult that punctures the felt sense of safety (e.g., financial stress, illness, accident, loss, etc.) or as a result of intergenerational transmission where it is passed down or internalized from parents who experienced difficulty themselves or through their own traumatized parents.”

And, of course, if you’re someone who already struggles with anxiety, self-doubt, and other mental health conditions, you might channel these feelings into your relationship with money.

“There are also genetic factors, including a person’s sensitivity (along the lines of Elaine Aron’s Highly Sensitive Person) and trait neuroticism,” says Bradshaw. “These genetic factors make it more likely that a person will be sensitized through the environmental factors described above.”

How to Treat Money Dysmorphia

Since money dysmorphia often stems from earlier experiences with money, many mental health professionals address the core of the issue.

“The thing we fear is usually a version of something that already happened that we are projecting into the future (Donald Winnicott’s “fear of breakdown” outlined in his 1974 paper of the same name),” says Bradshaw. “If we can surface and metabolize the traumatic incident through something like Somatic Therapy, EMDR, or exposure therapy, the charge is removed from the feared memory and the projected fear dissolves.”

“Once you have processed this feared material, you naturally regain access to your emotional core and start to feel more connected and more yourself,” he continues. “You can then feel your capability more easily, and your fears and doubts lose power over you.”

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Every couple swears they’ll be the ones who keep having great sex forever. Then a few years go by, someone’s wearing a mouthguard to bed, and sex becomes something they’ll definitely do this weekend.

Sex researchers led by Kristen Mark followed 87 couples for a month to find out why they weren’t having sex, and the most common explanations were incredibly boring. According to their study, men and women were equally likely to say things like “it just didn’t happen” when asked why they didn’t have sex. Sometimes there simply wasn’t time.

The more interesting differences came when people started explaining whose fault it was. Women were more likely to say they weren’t in the mood or were too tired, while men pointed to their partners or the kids. So women were blaming themselves, and men were blaming the person sleeping next to them. Groundbreaking stuff.

The Surprising Reasons Couples Stop Having Sex, According to Science

The finger-pointing didn’t do anyone any favors, either. Couples who blamed their partners for not having sex also reported lower sexual satisfaction, while those who saw it as a shared situation generally felt better about their relationships. And when one person wants sex more than the other, rejection can feel personal. “For the one yearning for touch and physical contact, it really is about feeling wanted and feeling loved,” therapist Michele Weiner-Davis told CNN.

Of course, we’re talking about 87 couples, most of whom were white and heterosexual. There’s only so much we can conclude about everyone’s sex life from a month of their experiences.

It’s also possible that people have unrealistic expectations about how frequently they’re supposed to be having sex. Another study found that the percentage of American adults aged 18 to 64 having sex weekly dropped from 55% in 1990 to 37% in 2024. And research led by Amy Muise at the University of Toronto Mississauga found that couples having sex more than once a week weren’t any happier than those doing it weekly. “It’s important to maintain an intimate connection with your partner without putting pressure,” Muise explained.

Then there’s the uncomfortable business of actually talking about sex. Admitting that you feel rejected or that you’re unhappy with how things are going takes some vulnerability, especially when you’re not sure how your partner will react.

“Even when you’ve been with someone for years, talking about sex can be scary because you’re exposing a really vulnerable part of yourself,” Mark told Men’s Health.

Sometimes the explanation really is as boring as two exhausted people who have to get up early for work. And one of them still has to put that damn mouthguard in.

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At first, dating someone who’s completely obsessed with you can feel incredible. They remember everything you tell them and want to spend every free minute together. A few months later, you’re wondering when they last saw their friends or did anything that didn’t involve you.

Psychologist Robert Vallerand has spent years studying this sort of thing. His Dualistic Model of Passion describes two types of passion: harmonious, where someone can be crazy about you and still have their own life, and obsessive, where the relationship starts consuming their time and attention. In one study, couples were more likely to stay together three months later when harmonious passion was high and obsessive passion was low.

So how can you tell when someone’s enthusiasm is getting a little out of hand?

1. Their Whole World Shrinks Down to You

Remember when they played softball every Thursday and had friends they saw regularly? Now they’re canceling plans to spend another night with you, and you can’t remember the last time they mentioned doing something on their own. Research has linked obsessive romantic passion to neglecting other relationships and activities. It’s nice to feel wanted, but being responsible for someone’s entire social life is exhausting.

2. They Can’t Let Something Go

A harmless comment you made over dinner has turned into three days of questions about what you meant. You’ve explained yourself several times, but they’re still bringing it up and asking if everything’s okay between you. In more severe cases, persistent relationship doubts and reassurance-seeking can be symptoms of relationship OCD, although overthinking an argument doesn’t mean someone has the condition. Psychologist Guy Doron’s research suggests these symptoms can also affect the other partner over time.

3. Their Basic Upkeep Goes Out the Window

When someone’s spending most of their time thinking about a relationship, other things can start getting neglected. They’re missing workouts they used to enjoy, staying up later than usual, and forgetting to take care of themselves. Research from Vallerand’s lab has connected obsessive passion with rumination, where the same worries keep coming back no matter how much time someone spends thinking about them.

Someone who’s this consumed by a relationship could be dealing with anxiety or struggling to maintain their own life. Psychology Today recommends reconnecting with friends and old hobbies. If the constant worrying and need for reassurance continue, therapy could help, too.

It’s nice when someone wants to spend time with you. After a while, though, you start wishing they’d make plans with literally anyone else.

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After decades of marriage, some couples have gotten so used to being unhappy together that they hardly notice it anymore. They go to work, come home, eat dinner and spend the evening on opposite ends of the couch.

The divorce rate among Americans over 50 doubled between 1990 and 2010, according to research from Bowling Green State University. And when researchers interviewed 52 divorced adults for a separate study, 75% cited a lack of commitment as a major reason their marriages ended. Infidelity and constant arguing were also common. Here’s how relationships can deteriorate after years together.

1. The Kids Left and the Conversation Went With Them

For years, there’s always something to discuss when you’re raising kids. Then the last one leaves home, and suddenly you’re having dinner across from someone you haven’t had an actual conversation with in ages. Sociologist Susan Brown told NPR that retirement and an empty nest can leave people wondering, “Is this the person I want to spend another 20 or 30 years with?”

2. Then Came the Eye-Rolling

After many years together, some couples have perfected the art of communicating their irritation without saying a word. The sigh when someone starts talking, the sarcastic comments, the eye-rolling. Psychologist John Gottman considers contempt one of the strongest predictors of divorce. Relationship counselor Mig Bennett told Metro that couples stuck in an argument should remember, “You can either be right, or you can be in a relationship.”

3. The Marriage Slid Down the Priority List

With work, raising children, and taking care of aging parents, it’s easy to spend years putting your marriage off until there’s more time. By the time that day comes, you might have forgotten what you used to enjoy doing together. That lack of commitment cited in the divorce study sometimes developed gradually, with couples becoming less willing to work on their relationship.

4. Someone Cheated

Nearly 60% of participants in the 2013 study cited infidelity as a major reason for divorce. Among those who identified a final straw, 24% named cheating. Some people try to repair the relationship afterward, especially when they’ve spent forever raising a family and sharing finances. For others, discovering an affair settles a decision they’ve been struggling with for years.

5. Drinking, Gambling and Other Final Straws

Substance abuse was another reason marriages ended, and the study also identified domestic violence as a common final straw. Addiction can take a serious toll on family finances and relationships, especially when someone refuses treatment. Abuse is a separate and more urgent concern, though, and personal safety comes first. The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers confidential support at 1-800-799-7233.

By the time some couples decide to divorce, they’ve spent years getting used to being unhappy together. And after 20 or 30 years of marriage, getting used to something can be a powerful reason to keep doing it.

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Going home with a guy for the first time means getting to see how he lives when he hasn’t had much time to prepare for company. Sometimes you’re pleasantly surprised. Other times, there’s a samurai sword in the shower.

And his apartment can tell you quite a bit about him. Psychologist Sam Gosling found that strangers could make surprisingly accurate judgments about certain personality traits just by looking around someone’s bedroom. So while you’re getting comfortable, you might want to pay attention to a few things.

1. The Sheets

A UK survey found that 45% of single men waited up to four months to wash their sheets. Four months. Another poll found dirty bedding was the biggest bedroom turnoff for 81% of women. A slightly unmade bed is one thing, but if there’s a sweat shadow, you might want to reconsider staying the night.

2. The Mattress on the Floor

A mattress on the floor in your early 20s? Sure. You’re broke, you’ve just moved out and furniture is expensive. But if he’s 35 and the rest of his apartment is fully furnished, you have to wonder why the bed frame is still missing.

3. The Bathroom

There’s one towel that’s been hanging there for an undisclosed amount of time, along with a bottle of three-in-one body wash. Fine, whatever. But having some toilet paper and a somewhat sanitary place to wash your hands seems like a fair expectation. And if there’s no shower curtain, how exactly has he been bathing?

4. The Kitchen

A fridge stocked exclusively with hot sauce and energy drinks is an interesting choice, but lots of people survive on takeout. The sink full of crusty dishes, though, is where things get questionable. Now you can’t stop thinking about how long they’ve been sitting there and when he last washed an actual plate.

5. The Wall Art

An old concert poster is harmless. A framed Wolf of Wall Street poster above the bed might inspire a few questions, especially if he’s really into Jordan Belfort. Gosling’s research has also associated inspirational posters with neuroticism. Make of that what you will when you spot a giant “Hustle Harder” print.

6. The Photo Situation

An old picture with an ex isn’t necessarily concerning, especially if it’s from a vacation or an important event. But several framed photos of the same woman around the apartment, with no explanation of who she is, would have me asking some questions before getting too comfortable.

Most of these things can be fixed with a trip to Target and an afternoon of cleaning. But women on Reddit have also described finding fist-sized holes punched through the drywall at a date’s house, and that’s a much better reason to grab your bag and leave. At least the sword in the shower makes for a funny story.

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On October 31, 1986, Universal Studios Hollywood launched its first-ever Halloween Horror Nights event. The big draw that evening was the Terror Tram, which was really just their normal, everyday Studio Tour repurposed to scare the crap out of people. “It’s one Halloween you’ll never forget. That is…if you live to talk about it,” promised a print advertisement for the event. Unfortunately, those words would end up sounding eerily prescient afterward.

At some point during the nighttime tour, trams were supposed to drive by a parked tram full of mannequins made up to look like corpses. That was 20-year-old Paul Rebalde’s cue to jump out from the pile of fake dead bodies and try to frighten the folks on the passing vehicles. However, one of those attempts didn’t go according to plan, and Rebalde somehow got himself stuck between the third and fourth sections of a four-section tram. In the process, he was run over and dragged for roughly 100 feet.

The Tragic Death That Shut Down Universal Studios’ Halloween Horror Nights for YEARS

Sadly, Rebalde was pronounced dead at the scene at approximately 9 p.m. that night. “There was no indication that the tram had a problem or anything like that,” said Universal Studios publicity director Joan Bullard of the incident. “The sheriff has told us that it was an unfortunate accident,” she continued. Though no changes were made to the show, Bullard assured visitors that safety procedures “would be heightened even more” the following evening.

Rebalde had been working several jobs at the park leading up to his death, including selling toys and managing a booth that sold film by the front gate. “He was one of the sweetest kids that worked up here,” recalled a fellow Universal Studios employee. “He was the kind of guy that always walked around with a smile on his face. Everybody liked him,” they added.

Halloween Horror Nights was discontinued for six years due to the tragedy, but eventually returned in 1992.

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Horror might not be everyone’s cup of tea, and that’s okay. The genre has fallen victim to epic cheesiness of the cheapest and most inauthentic variety. It’s really enough to give true lovers of the arts a heart attack. Thus, I have decided to present a list of 5 horrifying books (by authors other than the immortal Poe) that should appeal to even those who don’t especially fancy horror: The beauty of their language and profundity contained, even in the occasional midst of grotesquerie and hedonism, should be enough to dazzle any semi-intelligent lifeform. Horror comes in all kinds, including existential and moral, thus I believe it would be pointless to simply focus on literal monsters.

An honorable mention must be given to Justine, or The Misfortunes of Virtue (1791) by the infamous Marquis de Sade, who spent a good portion of his life imprisoned. This milestone played a role in getting its author locked up for the final time in 1801 on Napoleon’s wretched orders. The Thief’s Journal (1949) by Jean Genet will likewise always inevitably provoke gasps from pearl-clutchers. In addition, I highly recommend the “Indiscreet Jewels” (to make a Diderot reference) constituting the body of work of the outrageous Mr. Jean Lorrain, a gay author like Genet, whose achievements have proved both highly transgressive and timeless. Perhaps no one is quite as good at provoking nausea as Jean-Paul Sartre, who incidentally penned an excellent volume on Genet — sometimes, reading the rewarding yet frustrating Sartre is enough to make you want to jam a knife into your arm. His short story The Wall (1939) is guaranteed to send shivers down your spine.

Now, in the capricious interest of thoroughly repulsing you, here is a little description of the corpse of the eponymous protagonist from Émile Zola’s Nana (1880):

“She was fruit of the charnel house, a heap of matter and blood, a shovelful of corrupted flesh thrown down on the pillow. The pustules had invaded the whole of the face… and on that formless pulp, where the features had ceased to be traceable, they already resembled some decaying damp from the grave. One eye, the left eye, had completely foundered among bubbling purulence, and the other, which remained half open, looked like a deep, black, ruinous hole. The nose was still suppurating. Quite a reddish crush was peeling from one of the cheeks and invading the mouth, which it distorted into a horrible grin… Venus was rotting. ”  

Without further ado, let’s dive into our main list as we look forward to (or dread) upcoming Halloween festivities.

1. Georges Bataille’s The Story of the Eye (1928)

Blue of Noon (1957) might just be my favorite book by Georges Bataille, but the violent and sexually depraved The Story of the Eye seems to be his most disgusting. (Granted, Bataille did force us to look upon his beloved lingchi photos in The Tears of Eros, completed in 1961 as his final feat…) The Story of the Eye is remembered as the naughty French librarian’s most famous work — inspiration from the masterpiece has even been incorporated into a Marilyn Manson video. Thus, it’s a great entry point into the catalog of, in my immodest opinion, one of the most rewarding thinkers. As for the content, I find it too utterly appalling to repeat here, therefore you will just have to read the graphic novella for yourself and in the protection of a safe space in case it activates your gag reflexes or causes you to faint; the whole ghastly must-read smells of rotten eggs, and I’ll just say that it does feature eggs being used for some questionable purposes.

Before moving on, I’ll add that one of the most heartbreaking horrors is the story of how Bataille’s blind and paralyzed father died during WWI; Georges himself would be plagued by pulmonary tuberculosis and cerebral arteriosclerosis.

2. Joris-Karl Huysmans’ Là-Bas (1891)

Is there anything that feeds pestilently dark thoughts and feelings like the absinthine delirium of fin de siècle literature? Reading Huysmans can be enough to give you a neurotic fit — he possesses the superpower of even making an impossible menace out of the assailing (and, in my view, quite lovely) scent of frangipane. Despite the crippling anxiety he summons, Huysmans remains one of my most highly recommended authors for good reason. His nuanced descriptions, which induce sensory overload, are truly one of a kind; Huysmans was his own brand and belonged in his own category, even if À rebours (1884) arguably equates to the most perfect example of Decadent literature.

Just as Bataille would later become obsessed with the serial killer Gilles de Rais, Huysmans includes some dizzying and hallucinatory scrawlings on the abhorrent pedophile in Là-Bas. In Là-Bas, the wayward genius digs into his unhealthy preoccupations with Satanism and the occult. If you are a Satanist or even a nihilist, watch out before befriending Huysmans. All roads just might lead to Cavalry: Là-Bas led Huysmans to convert to Roman Catholicism in 1892, and this personal choice was reflected in his output. In other words, Huysmans can potentially alter your worldview and whisk you along on his spiritual path in ways you might find horrifying right now.

3. Oscar Wilde’s The Picture of Dorian Gray (1880)

Oscar Wilde, the embodiment of wit and charm, is one of the few beloved authors who actually deserves his place in history. Put down whatever cheap modern literature or bland, teacher-approved “classic” you might be reading, and take it upon yourself to ravenously consume the entirety of Wilde’s delicious catalog.

As most of us know by this point, The Picture of Dorian Gray presents a terrifying cautionary tale for chasers of youth, beauty, and vice. The plot takes its ill-fated turn after the impressionable Dorian falls victim to the magnetic Lord Henry’s dangerous influence. Even if you’ve already experienced this canonical work, read it again!

That said, my most beloved offering by Oscar Wilde is probably De Profundis, a letter written in 1897 during Wilde’s imprisonment that reveals the blinding beauty of his soul. It might sound cliché, but it is truly terrifying to fathom what man can do to his fellows.

4. Robert W. Chambers’ The King in Yellow (1895)

A bestseller during his lifetime, the bafflingly prolific Robert W. Chambers represented an odd case of a cultural contributor of genuine worth appealing to the masses during his lifetime without any major problems. This American visual artist and writer was incredibly versatile, diving into romance, sci-fi, history, war, (of course) horror, etc. The Art Nouveau charm often coloring Chambers’ inventive gems as well as his distinctively lively way with the pen continue to make him an irresistible hero, worthy of several places of honor on the bookshelf.

The engaging collection of short stories that compose The King in Yellow prove unforgettable, unshakably bizarre, troublingly mysterious, and darkly gorgeous. As demonstrated here, Chambers was particularly gifted at painting the depths of madness. In short,The King in Yellow is indeed one of the greatest horror books ever created.

5. Maurice Blanchot’s Death Sentence (1948)

Blanchot seems to be one of the most overlooked literary giants, perhaps because he strips away a lot of those components we regard as essentially human and to which we remain so childishly attached. As Bataille boasts the ability to completely transform your way of thinking, Blanchot could totally alter your approach to language. No one explored absence quite like Blanchot, and Death Sentence is bound to carve an everlasting void into your chest. The oddly immersive Death Sentence‘s depictions of the suffering and bravery of a woman dubbed “J.,” for example, return every now and then to haunt me. Blanchot’s stunning lines will cause you to keep pausing to reflect upon (and either photograph or screenshot) their uncanny content.

After you’ve completed Death Sentence and while you’re bracing yourself for your second reading, discover Blanchot’s Thomas the Obscure.  

The post 5 Horrifying Books for People Who Hate Horror (And Other Mentions) appeared first on vice.

The Wall Street Journal recently explored the issue of phones in restaurants, noting that many eating establishments have come to resemble “scroll zones that simply serve food and drinks.” The paper had earlier declared, “phones are becoming the new cigarettes.” You might think that very few individuals would appreciate their dinner companions staring down at their Apple devices during shared outings, but, then again, you often see whole tables absorbed in scrolling as a way to avoid actually communicating with each other or just to stave off social awkwardness, thereby often increasing the awkwardness.

The Wall Street Journal visited The Edge in Harlem, which proudly boasts a sign reading, “No Wifi / No Screens / Connect / With Each Other.” Phones, however, aren’t actually banned there, as it’s the philosophy that’s important. WSJ highlighted that The Antagonist in North Carolina makes a practice of distributing pouches by Yondr for electronics that can only be unlocked by staff. Meanwhile, Tribeca’s Eulalie outright bans phones. They told WSJ that they view their ban as empowering to diners, as it gives them an “out” and an explanation as to why they couldn’t take any calls that might have come their way while on premises.

The Rise of Phone-Free Restaurants Is Changing How Americans Eat Out

Personally, I agree with the sentiment that phones should generally be put away while eating. Even if there are no phone-addicts at your table, others can still spoil the atmosphere. No one wants to be in the background of someone else’s Instagram video. Another concern is that eating mindlessly while texting, for example, is highly disrespectful to the chef who prepared your meal, assuming that it is worthy of your focus.

However, too many rules can be perceived as off-putting, obnoxious, and make patrons feel like they’re in elementary school rather than paying for a luxury experience. While most calls are far from urgent, phones do serve as safety lines. The question becomes difficult because, in an ideal world, people would behave sensibly without having to be forced, but that is far from the case in 2026. In fact, I have even witnessed individuals go so far as to have the volume turned up on their devices while in restaurants, causing me to want to use the cutlery for purposes other than those for which they were designed.

Fortunately, as WSJ points out, according to recent findings by The Harris Poll, 83% of Gen Zers say they have taken steps to limit social media usage at some point. Thus, there is hope for a better future with fewer screens.

The post Why Some Restaurants Are Starting to Ban Cell Phones (and Why Customers Are Loving It) appeared first on vice.

This is bananas: Around 4:00 a.m. on October 24, a woman, Stephanie Oropeza, in a banana costume, stopped to help a driver who had just crashed into an eating establishment, The Moderne — Bar & Grill. According to WFTV Channel 9, the driver’s black SUV drove onto the bar’s patio, hit a cement planter, and sent tables and chairs flying, destroying six of the former and over twelve of the latter.

Oropeza was driving home from a Halloween party with her fiancé when they saw the driver veer off the road. They, thus, checked the individual for injuries and called for help. Oropeza told the local news channel that she’s actually studying to be a nurse, so lending a hand felt natural. The restaurant has confirmed that none of their staff members were hurt, and, fortunately, no one was dining outside at the time of the crash.

Woman in Banana Costume Rushes to Help After SUV Plows Into Florida Restaurant

Still, the photos of the wreckage weren’t pleasant… The establishment’s owner, Michael Nguyen, estimates that replacing the custom fence alone could cost between $30,000 and $50,000. He was in Japan when the crash occurred.

Despite its own losses, The Moderne posted a surveillance video and asked the public to help find the good Samaritan in yellow who came to the rescue, joking that the banana had “split” before they could thank her. Of course, Oropeza was identified pretty quickly.

The cause of the crash is still unconfirmed.

The post Florida’s Newest Local Hero Is a Woman Dressed as a Giant Banana. Here’s How She Saved the Day. appeared first on vice.

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Are you in a relationship with someone who continuously downplays your emotions and experiences? You might be facing microdismissals, or the acts of subtly brushing off a partner’s feelings, boundaries, or needs. When done in excess, this habit can be incredibly invalidating and lead to disconnect within a relationship.

What Is Microdissmal? 

According to Dr. Alexandra Foglia, DMFT, the Director of Family Program at All in Solutions, a network of treatment centers located in Florida, New Jersey, and California, “Microdismissal describes subtle, often repeated ways of dismissing someone’s feelings rather than merely one distracted response.”

“For example, a possible sign that someone doesn’t respect your boundaries is repeatedly interrupting or changing the conversation when you’re sharing something important to you,” Foglia states. “Bottom line, then, a pattern is behavior that we return to time after time, that we do without necessarily thinking about.”

Microdismissal can show up in a variety of ways, from talking over someone to laughing off their feelings. Sometimes, these habits appear to be in good fun. But over time, they can eat away at the other person’s confidence, sense of security, and emotional safety within the relationship.

“Another sign is selective engagement,” says Foglia. “For example, eye rolling is often used to express impatience. When eye rolling is used with sarcasm, it often reduces trust. Sometimes, humor can be used to dismiss someone’s feelings. No one deserves to have their feelings invalidated by being told that they are being dramatic.”

Impacts of Microdismissal

As state above, microdismissal can leave someone feeling insecure and disconnected within their own relationship.

“The impact depends on frequency, context, and repair,” says Foglia. “Experiencing accidental or intentional social rejection can easily contribute to feelings of invisibility.”

As these emotions build, you might begin to resent your partner and how they treat you, which only widens the gap between you two.

“Resentment can build if you have difficulty expressing your true feelings about issues within your relationship,” Foglia says. “Ultimately, a relationship with a high level of conflict can lead to resentment and anger, causing one or both partners to feel estranged from one another.”

Why Might Someone Microdismiss Others?

In my own experience, I’ve endured microdismissal from individuals who consistently dismiss their own traumas, feelings, and needs. This might stem from shame, chronic invalidation, or conflict avoidance in their past. Sometimes, acknowledging someone else’s experience means acknowledging our own. If we’re not ready to do that, it might present as microdismissal toward our partners.

“Some people engage in microdismissal because conflict feels threatening, but these reasons do not erase the behavior’s impact,” Foglia says. “They may withhold their own emotions from others, never letting them see when they are afraid, sad, or angry.” 

This behavior isn’t always intentional, either. In fact, many people simply don’t know how to process their own emotions or sit with their own discomfort. Instead of engaging in further conversation, they laugh or brush it off.

“There are times, of course, when laughter is used to cover up anxiety or to escape from the experience of facing threatening material. But the gap can be bridged by open and honest communication,” says Foglia. “By approaching your partner thoughtfully, you can create a space for honest conversation and shared growth.”

The post Introducing ‘Microdismissal,’ the Toxic Relationship Habit You Might Not Even Notice appeared first on vice.

Are you guilty of over-apologizing for anything and everything? Trust me, you’re not the only one. “I’m sorry” is basically my catchphrase, even when I’ve done absolutely nothing wrong.

Someone walks into me? “Sorry!” Someone cuts me in line. “Sorry!!” Someone feels bad for making me feel bad? “Sorry!!!”

It’s instinctual, at this point, but there’s nothing cute about it. Constantly assuming the blame for issues you didn’t cause, or even for innocent mistakes that aren’t actually hurting anyone, does not win you an award. While it might seem endearing, this habit keeps you small and powerless.

Why We Over-Apologize

There are many reasons one might over-apologize, from social conditioning to pure awkwardness.

“Apologizing is empathetic and, when done correctly, can be done through the lens of accountability and respect,” says Maggie Pajak, MSW, therapist with The Witch’s Therapist, a holistic, LGBTQ2S+-affirming therapy collective based in London, Ontario. “But when we overapologize, it can have deeper psychological roots.”

According to Pajak, this can include low self-esteem, rejection sensitivity, anxiety, people-pleasing tendencies, and conflict avoidance.

Who Is Prone to Over-Apologizing?

While anyone might engage in this habit, over-apologizing might be more common among certain groups of people.

“It’s absolutely more common in neurodiverse populations,” says Pajak. “That’s especially true for rejection-sensitive dysphoria.”

“People with anxiety, or who dealt with extreme criticism or shame during childhood, may preemptively apologize to avoid feeling that shame,” Pajak adds. “It’s almost like they’re getting in front of the shame before it happens.”

And, of course, let’s not forget women, who have been conditioned to be more accommodating, polite, and attentive, Pajak says.

“Also, women are more likely to be the victims of violence in domestic situations, and as a result they may find it necessary to overapologize to placate a partner’s violent tendencies,” she adds.

4 Ways to Stop Over-Apologizing

There’s a time and place for apologizing, but only when you feel you’ve genuinely done something wrong and want to express your guilt. Otherwise, let’s break this bad habit in the four following ways.

1. Acknowledge Instead of Apologizing 

One of my favorite ways to fight the urge to apologize is by replacing an apology with gratitude.

“This helps us pause and reframe the situation,” says Pajak. “It shifts the focus from your guilt or shame to your gratitude toward the other person. For example, instead of saying ‘sorry it took me so long to reply,’ you might say, ‘I appreciate your patience.’”

2. Challenge Your Negative Thoughts

We often apologize from a place of shame: shame for being “inconvenient,” shame for taking up space, shame for having needs. But have you really done something worth apologizing for, or are you just holding yourself to impossible standards and denying your own humanness?

“This is important because we can still feel negative emotions in scenarios where we’ve done the right thing,” Pajak explains. “So, feeling guilt, shame, or like you’ve disappointed someone isn’t necessarily a sign you need to apologize for anything.”

3. Acknowledge Your Needs

Every person on this planet has their own set of needs. What makes yours any less valid?

“In some cases, people who overapologize do so because they grew up in an environment where their needs were neglected or ignored,” Pajak states. “When that’s in our past, it’s easy to feel guilty or ashamed for making those needs known. Learning to acknowledge and express your needs with people who feel safe can help you avoid overapologizing.”

4. Sit With the Discomfort

One of the best ways to drop this self-conscious habit is by sitting with your own discomfort.

“Attached to the previous example, it’s important to sit with the feelings that come up the first time you assert your needs,” says Pajak. “Where do you feel it in your body? What emotions is it attached to? Perhaps you feel shame, or perhaps you were previously made to feel unsafe. Can you just hold that discomfort? Can you sit with it? This can help you build a tolerance to that feeling, as uncomfortable as it may be.”

The post Why You Apologize for Everything, Even When You’ve Done Nothing Wrong appeared first on vice.

There’s nothing more off-putting than a person bragging about something while simultaneously engaging in self-deprecation, only to appear humble and relatable. Unfortunately, many of us—myself included—engage in this behavior without even realizing it. Also known as “humblebragging,” this action is rarely well-received. In fact, you’d be better off just outright flaunting your success or blessings without the fake humility. 

What Is a Humblebrag?

Coined by comedic writer Harris Wittels, a humblebrag is “a specific type of boast that allows the offender to broadcast their achievements without the necessary shame and guilt that should normally accompany such claims.”

Redditors on this post provided some great examples of humblebrags:

• “The wifi here backstage in the green room at the Kanye concert is so shitty! I need a better phone.”
• “My life sucks. Had to buy the new Ferrari in blue because red won’t be available for six months.”
• “Lol, I lost so much weight; now I have to buy more clothes #fml”

You get the point.

Self-deprecation (typically fake) is usually at the core of these humblebrags. Individuals making these statements often attempt to appear relatable while also boasting about their blessings.

“I’d call it a mostly negative habit, not because the person is arrogant, but because it backfires,” says Dr. Maritsa Yzaguirre-Kelley, DCM, LMHC, founder of Peace of Mind Evaluation and Consulting Services and Obtaining Mastery in Boca Raton. “Listeners reliably detect the brag underneath, and the disguise reads as less honest than a straightforward celebration would have been.”

Why Do People Engage in Humbebragging?

According to Mariana Plata, MSc, child and adolescent clinical psychologist, educator, speaker, and mental health writer for Psychology Today, “If I could summarize the reason as to why I think we humblebrag so often, I would choose only one word: shame.” 

“We humblebrag to avoid this unpleasant feeling that lurks over us,” she continues in her article on the topic. “We disguise our bragging of something we have with fake humility because we have been taught to hide our successes.”

My two cents? If you want to brag, say it with your chest instead of hiding behind fake humility. You’re allowed to feel proud of and excited about your accomplishments and blessings.

Bragging vs. Celebrating

As Plata notes in her article, “There’s a fine line between celebrating your successes and bragging. The first one is authentically owning what you’ve achieved and the hard work that’s taken for you to get there. But don’t try to disguise them based on shame or competition. Own your successes and flaunt them. Because if you’ve worked hard to achieve something, you are allowed to flaunt it shamelessly, but always [balance] it … with empathy and compassion.”

This discussion reminds me of a sentiment from one of my favorite authors and influencers, Florence Given. Given preaches the importance of audacity—of refusing to stay small while allowing others to ask, “Who does she think she is?!”

Women, especially, are taught to make do with their “humble crumble,” as Given calls it. But we all are worthy of an abundant feast. You don’t need to be humble about the accomplishments you worked tirelessly to achieve. Rather than bragging with pretension, own your success with shameless pride.

“The alternative I teach clients is clean ownership plus internal anchoring: share the win plainly with people who are safe and build the slower confidence that comes from keeping promises to yourself, which never needs an audience to hold up,” Plata concludes.

The post Why ‘Humblebragging’ Makes People Dislike You, According to Psychology appeared first on vice.

The other night—while decompressing after a long day of writing—I was scrolling through comments on an Instagram post and spotted one that stopped me dead in my tracks: “This was clearly written by AI. The em dashes are a dead giveaway.”

I’ve never jumped out of bed and started pacing in anger so quickly in my life.

Are we serious? Are we so far gone that the proper use of punctuation is an apparent indicator of AI?

How many of you assumed this very article was AI-generated, thanks to the two em dashes in my first sentence? Unfortunately, I’d guess at least a quarter of you had that initial thought.

While I fully understand the urge to call out AI content, nothing boils my blood quite like a reader who falsely accuses writers of using AI merely because they include em dashes in their content. I, for one, have been relying on the em dash since middle school. If you were to read my moody Tumblr poetry from that time, you’d be quick to rescind that accusation. As a writer, I’d marry the em dash if I could.

So you could imagine my rage at this random Instagram comment on someone else’s post—someone I don’t even know, mind you. Surely, it was an overreaction on my part…I can admit my faults.

But as hard as I tried to continue scrolling and ignore this ignorance, the allegation—which didn’t even involve me, at least not directly—has continued to gnaw at me for days.

And so, instead of cursing out the well-intentioned, albeit misinformed, commenter or ripping the hair out of my head, I decided to write this article. The pen is mightier than the sword, as they say.

The AI-Generated Downfall of the Em Dash

AI is trained to use punctuation marks and sentence structures commonly found in editorial content and literature written by human artists, scholars, and professionals. ChatGPT is not pulling the em dash out of its nonexistent a**. It’s mimicking real, talented, and passionate writers—not the other way around.

And unfortunately, many of today’s readers are so used to consuming social media captions written in all lowercase letters with lazy abbreviations that they lack exposure to real literary tools.

“Part of me thinks the current situation with the em dash is ridiculous, but part of me also thinks we’ve gotten to this point to some extent because many people simply weren’t as familiar with this punctuation mark before it became more frequently used in AI-generated text,” says Erik Gfesser, President of Fesswise LLC, whose own writing has been falsely flagged by AI detectors.

“As an avid reader as well, I tend to come across the em dash more frequently when more elevated writing is involved. For example, I come across it much more frequently in literature and some periodicals such as The New Yorker magazine,” Gfesser continues. “Readers not exposed to such reading material likely don’t come across em dashes as frequently, so if they suddenly see these being used on a regular basis it’s not surprising to me that they might make broad generalizations about the authorship.”

The Case for the Em Dash

To many non-writers, this might sound like a simple fix: Just don’t use the em dash anymore. To which I’d reply…over my dead body. Why should writers cheapen our own content just to avoid baseless accusations?

“I refuse to let AI take away punctuation that can make writing more interesting,” says Adeline Yorgason, writer and content specialist at Inkhouse, a communications and marketing agency. “I have and will continue to use them strategically. After all, AI learned how to write from real human writers, and I will not let it bully me into silence.”

“The em dash is an integral piece of an author’s toolkit. It allows dialogue to stop and start and shift direction, reflecting how people actually speak,” adds award-winning author S.M. Stevens. “It makes in-depth descriptive passages easier to follow, rather than getting bogged down in an excess of commas or, heaven forbid, semicolons. (Semicolons always feel Victorian to me.)”

AI’s Devastating Impact on Writers

As a writer in the AI era, I’m already competing against individuals and companies that do, in fact, outsource their jobs to AI. Now I have to worry about being falsely accused of sleeping with the enemy every time I use my favorite punctuation tool?

Fortunately—and unfortunately—I’m not alone in my grief.

“As a writer who has loved the em dash since the dawn of time, the idea that a few em dashes in written content now often translates to ‘this was written by AI’ is painful to watch,” says Yorgason. “Good writing requires time. It requires something of the soul, and AI takes all of that away. When you’ve taken the time to write a piece of content and then get accused of using AI, especially because you’ve done something as simple as use a few em dashes, it can be gut-wrenching.”

“The fact that em dash use is seen as proof of AI-generated prose or content is potentially devastating,” Stevens adds. “That’s not hyperbole, because being falsely accused of using AI for your writing can be career-ending.”

It’s true: I’ve even heard of writers losing their jobs because they were falsely accused of using AI. (Newsflash: those AI detectors are highly inaccurate.) And before you argue, “Well, only a terrible writer would get flagged as AI slop,” remember where these LLMs learned their tricks. Sure, a distinct voice and creative writing style might override an AI detector, but that’s not always the case.

Perhaps that’s why I take this knee-jerk reaction of ignorant feedback so personally.

As Stevens so eloquently states, “Any person—or any technology trained by a person—who evaluates writing based on em dash usage has a moral imperative to broaden their criteria and leave the humble em dash alone!”

You can accuse me of using AI—the very tool that threatens my career and livelihood every single day—all you want. I won’t be removing the em dash from my writing.

As for the skeptics, well…perhaps it’s time to expand your reading horizons.

The post Stop Accusing Writers of Using AI Just Because They Use Em Dashes appeared first on vice.

Every job interview eventually gets around to the question about your greatest strength. You’ll say you’re detail-oriented or a team player, and they’ll smile and pretend it’s the first time they’ve heard either answer. 

Psychologist Alice Boyes has a different way of looking at what we’re good at. Writing in Psychology Today, she suggests considering the “things you’re willing to do that 95% of people aren’t.” She gives the example of a manager who happily spends six months figuring out office politics before pitching an idea. Her coworkers could do the same thing, but most would rather get on with their lives.

Some strengths aren’t especially impressive on paper. Maybe you’re the person who doesn’t mind filling out paperwork for four government agencies, or you can work with the office narcissist without wanting to put your head through a wall. Other people might have the same abilities. They just have absolutely no interest in using them.

And there’s a reason to figure out what yours are. Gallup research found that people who use their strengths daily are six times more likely to be engaged at work and three times more likely to report an excellent quality of life.

Boyes recommends asking yourself five questions, each a little harder to answer than the last:

• What am I willing to do that 50% of people aren’t?
• What am I willing to do that 70% of people aren’t?
• What am I willing to do that 90% of people aren’t?
• What am I willing to do that 95% of people aren’t?
• What am I willing to do that 99% of people aren’t?

At 50%, you might come up with something fairly ordinary, like paying attention to details. By the time you reach 95% or 99%, you’re looking at habits that other people find exhausting. Someone who hates repeating a task might spend hours inventing a way around it. That could save everyone time, or drive the entire office insane.

Boyes also suggests getting away from descriptions like “resilient” or “risk-taker.” She describes a woman working in commercial real estate who gets excited whenever another obstacle threatens a deal. Most people would be ready to throw their laptop out the window. She’s already figuring out what to try next.

And if nothing comes to mind immediately, that’s fine. Boyes recommends sitting with the questions and noticing what you’re willing to put up with over the next few months.

You might discover your greatest strength is something you’ve spent years assuming everyone else could do, too.

The post 5 Questions That Could Reveal Your Greatest Hidden Strengths, According to Psychology appeared first on VICE.

Dating has always involved some guessing. Lately, though, the guessing feels like the whole thing.

In Body+Soul’s 2026 Sex Census, mixed signals topped Australians’ list of modern dating frustrations at 55%, ahead of ghosting at 37% and unclear intentions at 35%. And anyone who’s dated recently probably knows the routine. You have a great first date, get a sweet text afterward, and then hear absolutely nothing for days. Meanwhile, this person somehow finds time to watch every single one of your Instagram Stories.

Psychiatrist Amir Levine, co-author of Attached, thinks we should stop calling these situations mixed signals. “Instead of calling it mixed signals, really, what it is, is uncertainty,” he told Body+Soul. And the longer you’re left wondering where you stand, the more time you can end up spending thinking about someone you barely know.

There’s actually research behind that. In a study published in Psychological Science, researchers showed 47 college women Facebook profiles of men who supposedly had rated their attractiveness. Some were told the men liked them a lot, while others weren’t sure how interested the men were. The women who didn’t know where they stood reported the most attraction and spent the most time thinking about the men. Granted, that’s a small study, but anyone who’s checked their phone 40 times waiting for a text can relate.

Why You Can’t Stop Thinking About Someone Who Sends Mixed Signals

Levine’s advice is to ask for what you want early on and pay attention to the response. If you’ve had a good date, tell the person you’d like to see them again and suggest making plans. You can even say you prefer knowing when you’re going to see someone instead of spending the week guessing.

And then see what they do. Someone who wants to see you can make plans or suggest a better night. If you keep getting vague answers and excuses, consider what you want before you waste another weekend waiting for a text.

You should think about your own habits, too. Levine recommends mentioning consistency in your dating profile if that’s important to you. And if you’ve lost interest in someone, politely tell them. No one enjoys sending a rejection text, but the person on the receiving end deserves to know.

If someone can’t give you a straight answer about getting dinner next week, imagine trying to make actual life plans with them.

The post Why Mixed Signals Make You Want Someone Even More (And What to Do About It) appeared first on VICE.